http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ Semi daily fourhman.com newspost. en-us joe@fourhman.com 2008-05-11T23:27:12-05:00 hourly 1 2000-01-01T12:00+00:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/things-we-learn-25.html Microsoft is proud of only nabbing 60% of GTAIV sales.Worldwide, there are nearly 19 million 360s, to only 12 million PS3s... yet only slightly more than half of GTAIV's launch week sales went to the 360 version. Out of the 6 million copies sold, 3.2 mill were the 360 version and 2.6 were for the PS3. A console that boasts an additional 7 million consoles in homes (I know, I know, these numbers do not factor in broken consoles, of which Microsoft has plenty, nor account for people who own more than one of the same console), a console that paid $50 million for "exclusive" to-come DLC content, a console that offers the robust Live experience and the wholly unique achievement concept... can't even manage to properly smash the competition on the biggest game made to date. By rights, this should have been an 80/20 split. So either there's far fewer working 360s out there than the 19 million would suggest... or people still think of GTA has a PlayStation franchise, regardless of what the 360 can offer. Will GTA keep Niko as series protagonist?Based on clues inside the game and on Rockstar's website, rumors are swirling that GTAIV frontman Niko Bellic will hop a flight from Liberty City to San Andreas for the next GTA game. I really like this idea... that we'll follow one man through this generation's GTA games. Could be absolutely epic. I predict he dies at the end of the trilogy. Also, I predict a trilogy. 2934@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-11T23:27:12-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/mike-and-i-talk-1.html continued from here MIKE: I most certainly agree that movement for many of the miniatures games is downright hideous. However, as I only play those games with people I like, it really doesn't become too much of an issue. Pretty much that person is you, so I have no worries. When [old pal] Chris gets involved I know to run away at flank speed as he can get a bit touchy about the whole process, but that is also the same person who cheated for years at Stratego with me. I do seem to recall a bit of testiness when you two fine lads played Pirates two summers ago. JOE: Oh my god, I just want to forget that he and I ever played Pirates. Not only is it sad that he and I got into it over a stupid game, but also that we neutered the game's balance. Would you agree that I'm extraordinarily picky about things like that? Maybe I'm naive about game designers, but I want to trust that the ruleset exists in a delicate, intricate structure... so you can't just toss something out without affecting something else. In the Pirates case, we played that any ship could fire ALL cannons as long as at least one was in range. This gives the bigger ships an unfair advantage, negating their usual penalties of speed, position and range. Not that I haven't encountered genuinely bad, poorly-tested games. Killer Bunnies is just a disaster from start to finish. The Inuyasha TCG is almost absurdist in design, in a bad way. Didn't we "figure out" Loco inside of three hands? I still don't quite get the fairness of the endgame in Monsters Menace America. We asked the poor Zatch Bell TCG demo guy, "So if you essentially never shuffle your deck, won't every game between the same decks always play exactly the same?" And I remember you declared Kill Doctor Lucky broken almost immediately. 2875@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-11T13:02:09-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/the-week-in-lin-56.html Too many cats. (YouTube)This is really funny at first, until you start thinking about it. osu!This is the first time I've wanted a Windows setup in years: there's a homebrew PC-based Ouendan/EBA copycat, that allows you to make your own song levels! twisney.comWhee! Twitter-style info only from people inside Disney World. Now that's targeted! I love the flickr gallery. 2894@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-09T23:55:41-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/all-the-waiting.html Finally! I've been whining about it since before the Wii launched, but we now have the ability to download DS demos from the Wii. It's buried inside a menu of an app primarily designed to play commercials, but it's there. The Nintendo Channel launched this morning, to everyone's surprise. Nintendo just loves to manipulate their own little universe. Sony would have announced this three weeks ago; Microsoft would have made it part of a Mountain Dew promotion. I think I've made that comparison joke before. Video playback is predictably crappy, due to both server load and the general Wii online slowness. No matter what video I picked, it would only run about 12 seconds of it, then sit and load again for another thirty seconds. When a video is about a minute long, having it take five minutes to watch it - in pieces - just isn't worth it. I would like to watch promo videos. I would even watch videos for games I already own, just because. But if it's not fast and easy to click through a pile of them, I'll just head back to my iMac. 2895@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-08T00:26:53-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/i-review-the-la.html It sucked. The costume is horrible. There better be hours of screen test footage proving why they can't make a decent fabric-based cowl, because this rubber head bullshit is just pathetic. Christian Bale's chin looks really uncomfortable in there. You know what's key to being a really great hand-to-hand combatant? Being able to turn your head. It's no wonder all these fight scenes are chopped up to hell, because it's ridiculous. Every time Qui-Gon smashes Batman's head through a window, he looks like a garden statue. Why all the flying? Why is Batman gliding through 40% of these last thirty minutes? Is gliding cool? Was that Bullock? Did he live? I liked the fear gas hallucination stuff. Had I watched the preceding two hours, I suspect I may have enjoyed the Scarecrow. 2893@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-06T22:57:59-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/things-we-learn-24.html Darkrai at Toys R Us May 31/June 1.Jeez, Nintendo Power always slips this into the ass-end of the mag where no one ever sees it. The weekend of May 31st is this summer's big Pokemon event at Toys R Us... and this time the downloadable prize is Darkrai, a secret legendary pokemon that was ruined for all of us by hackers about three minutes into the release of Diamond/Pearl. NP also says that ALL DS games will be $5 off. After that ridiculous three-hour install, MGO is merely OK.It's all right. I had some fun standing on a roof and killing enemies as they tried to climb up my ladder. It's only a beta, but I bet it's awfully close to the final version. Is MGO still a free pack-in with MGS4? I don't even know any more. Metal Gear is such an engrossing solo experience for me, that I'm not at all excited for a big online multiplayer iteration. Unless I knew like twelve guys with PS3s, but that seems highly unlikely. At the least, MGO shows the visual depth we can expect from MGS4. 2891@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-04T20:55:35-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/i-wasnt-tagged.html Noticed this weblog meme going around and found it interesting enough to participate, especially in light of this weekend's Free Comic Book Day. 1) What was the first comic you remember reading? Probably a Harvey book. Or something Uncle Scrooge. I had a bunch of Richie Rich / Casper / Hot Stuff. Like, 1979 or so. I definitely favored the Casper and Hot Stuff books, as I found the concepts of ghosts and devils much more interesting than the adventures of a rich snot. Oooooh, just remembered Spooky. Casper's asshole cousin. I liked Spooky a whole lot. 2) What was the first comic that made you realize that you might be in this for the long haul? Probably the first Ambush Bug mini (1985). The first issue I read was #3, where Ambush Bug points out all the ridiculous continuity and forgotten Silver Age characters of the DCU... and it made me want to find out more. I learned a lot about persistent fictional universes, which is to say I learned that they exist. 2892@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-04T01:45:35-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/the-week-in-lin-55.html Funny Pokemon Movie (YouTube)It's really slow, but I think it may be funny because it's so slow. State moves to ban fake testicles on vehicles (Yahoo News)At least this keeps one or two politicos from launching another obnoxious attack on television or video games. Screens of Talim in Soulcalibur IV (Kotaku)Talim. Purchase confirmed. 2882@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-02T22:23:40-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/picture-post.html Here's some recent pictures, covering some recent life events, a maxed out Wii Message Board and the critical fail of the Metal Gear Online beta install. Just so you lads know what you're getting into, that's what 64 ounces of Gatorade-fueled bowel irrigation fluid looks like. Rubik's Cube provided for scale. Now drink eight oz every ten to fifteen minutes until it's all gone. 2889@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-02T00:21:14-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/05/coconut-mall-it.html Nothing too amazing here, just a 50cc run through Coconut Mall. If you have Mario Kart Wii, this will be rather pedestrian... but if you haven't, it might show off one of the game's cool new levels. For added enjoyment, this replay features Peach on her Sugarscoot or Sweetcycle or Sweetsugar or whatever it's called. There's Mii integration all over the Mall, both as bystanders and in store signage. Although it's naturally a bit blurry at the standard YouTube res of blocky-pixels-viewed-through-flashlight-lens. Three lucky Miis are placed in parking lot obstacles... in this case, it's my buddy Mike, Chicken Little, and my sister Marci. I don't think any of the MKWii levels let you plow through Miis like bowling pins, but that would have been awesome. Yet another Wii game that would have benefitted from the system-level screenshot feature I keep proposing. 2890@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-05-01T02:22:56-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/04/that-wonderful.html So, two big games arrived at fourhman.home this evening, but I practiced some severe delayed gratification and mowed the lawn first. I saw two neighbors also out mowing and thought "There's two chaps who don't have Grand Theft Auto IV." But then I thought they might be thinking the same about me. I went for Mario Kart first, navigating the confusing, ill-thought out menus that end up in the installation of the Mario Kart Channel. Game-specific Channels are a fantastic idea. I'm sure we'll see more of them. I did one four-race Grand Prix with the Wii Wheel and then vowed never to touch it again. It just isn't precise enough. I dived right back to the Wavebird. Had no trouble pulling off the ramp stunts with the Wavebird's d-pad (stunts are just a Remote flick when playing with the Wii Wheel.) Of course, I only did a handful of 50cc races since the evening's main event was GTAIV. Mario Kart Wii is Mario Kart, on Wii. Doesn't seem to be much else to it. I'll always track Mario Kart as a top pick, especially for multiplayer parties with a mix of gamer types, but this latest edition can't hold a candle to Smash Bros as far as Awesome Wii Experiences goes. It's just, you know, Mario Kart. 2886@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-04-30T00:56:39-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/04/i-was-rammed-in.html I marched into Toys R Us this morning - on route to my colonoscopy - expecting to pick up GTAIV, and walked out with nothing. I had the release day wrong. It's tomorrow. I don't know how I messed that up. I made my colonoscopy appointment specifically on what I thought was GTA day. And I was giggling as I did it, planning to combine a legal sick day from work with the childlike wonder of Grand Theft Auto. I guess I got "week of 4/28" confused with "4/28" as I scheduled my scoping, and I never circled back to double-check myself. So all this time I've been waiting for 4/28, when a simple internet search shows that everybody else has been stoked for 4/29 as far back as January. The worst part is that I had to be corrected by the monkey at Toys R Us. The same chimp who laughed when I inquired about No More Heroes and speculated that they would never get that game in stock, and by the way, it's been in stock for weeks. How embarrassing. I even had my mom along with me (she was my designated driver for the colonoscopy), so she could vouch for my age in case I was carded! To make matters worse, I couldn't even pick up Mario Kart Wii, because I have a coupon for $10 off $100. For the sake of $10, I'm buying both games at the same time. Tomorrow. Probably on my lunch break. 2884@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-04-28T20:41:54-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/04/things-we-learn-23.html FREE COMIC BOOK DAYThis Saturday is FREE COMIC BOOK DAY. Stop by your local comic shop and help yourself to a selection of free books. If your local store is as cool as mine, there will be other special events, sales and giveaways on hand. OK, all you losers who own the Spider-Man Movie Trilogy, Heroes Season One, and that hilariously ironic Adam West Batman t-shirt: time to man up and sample pop culture at the head of the stream, rather than simply sip at the processed dregs at the end of the line. It's too late to declare yourself "into" Iron Man and retain any credibility, so get down to FREE COMIC BOOK DAY and see how the cooler half lives. And buy something too, you damn cheapskate. I've found another game I want to demo at Origins.And it's Yetisburg, a North vs South card game that adds giant Canadian Yetis to the Battle of Gettysburg. If your demo can't get me to buy the game even after hearing that concept, then it must be complete unplayable shit. 2880@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-04-27T21:17:17-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/04/and-now-photos.html And now, an unexpectedly themed arrangement of Brawl photos... first, some cute trophy collections, then some photos sent to me from folks on my Friend List. First, a pair of Pokemon retrospectives. The four fire-type starters, each representing a different generation. Charmander from Red/Blue, Torchic from Ruby/Sapphire, Cyndaquil from Gold/Silver, and Chimchar from Diamond/Pearl. Then we see four end-of-game legendaries... Groudon from Ruby/Sapphire, Moltres from Red/Blue, Suicune from Gold/Silver, and Palkia from Diamond/Pearl. 2879@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ Smash Brawl Photos 2008-04-26T23:32:29-05:00 http://www.fourhman.com/blog/archive/2008/04/the-week-in-lin-54.html DENKI GROOVE - MONONOKE DANCE (YouTube)Great J-pop music video, animated entirely with stick puppets. Two Brothers Meditating Upon Questions of Pac-Man (Kotaku)Two guys discuss the size of Pac-Man's turds in a seriously hilarious IM conversation. America Sung (Mice Age)Kevin Yee puts forth the notion that Disneyland has not been "perfect" since April 1988, when America Sings closed. Avoiding fanboy arguments, that was the last day that every available space was utilized in a running ride... no closed areas, empty buildings, and abandoned attractions. Awesome scary photos of America Sings robots half-dressed. 2874@http://www.fourhman.com/blog/ 2008-04-25T20:28:40-05:00