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Cool Things I Don't Think DC Does Anymore
Tuesday / 10.16.07 / 09:55PM / Joe

Superman's Vibrating Face
I think this was originated by John Byrne in his Man of Steel miniseries that presented the new canonical Superman immediately after Crisis. The idea was that whenever Superman saw he was being photographed or videotaped, he would quickly shake his head to blur his features, so people wouldn't get clear images in the newspaper and connect him to Clark Kent.

Yeah, it's silly... almost Silver Age silly. But it impressed upon me just how difficult it was to be Superman, with his heightened senses. That guy operates on a level way beyond normal humans, if he has to be constantly on a sub-cognitive lookout for recording devices in crowd scenes.

Status: Probably hasn't been discussed since Byrne's miniseries. Although we constantly see Byrne's other contribution to the mythos: Superman shaving by bouncing his heat vision off a reflective piece of metal.

Batman is an Urban Legend
I LOVED this one. It probably originates from around the same time, that delicate little post-Crisis era when DC had this concerted push to make their heroes more realistic. There's definitely an echo of it in the Michael Keaton Batman movie.

Having Gotham City in a constant state of confusion over whether Batman actually exists just seemed so damned smart to me, and I like when Batman is smart. While other cities turned their highly-visible hometown heroes into celebs (witness Cental City's gushing Flash Museum), Batman worked to maintain his secrecy, using doubt and fear as weapons in his war on crime.

Silver Age fans hate this idea, as it deletes all the stupid Batcopters and Batman-shaking-hands-with-the-Mayor kind of junk. I think it just makes a lot of sense.

Status: Completely forgone. Batman is all the time hanging out with cops at crime scenes and standing stage left while Superman addresses the UN. I cringe every time I see a panel with Batman on a TV monitor.

Batman hates Green Lanterns
I thought this was smegging brilliant. A guy who honed his body to physical perfection, who refuses to use guns of any kind, who is damn well convinced that 99% of everybody else in a costume is an amateur who should retire and get out of the way... this guy hates an organization that numbers in the thousands, mystically selects members from the non-trained populace, and gives them the most powerful weapon in the universe.

Duh.

I first recall this coming up when Hal Jordan returned to active DCU status, and Batman went to great lengths to point out how Hal was a post-psychotic murderer. Then it was like, the Bat hates Lanterns and he hates Hal most of all. But I'm sure Batman's years in the JLI with Guy Gardner didn't help.

Status: played out. There was a story beat in Infinite Crisis where Batman and Hal had to work together, and it too-quickly moved them into a grudging respect. I would have read stories about Batman smack-talking the Corps for years.

Big Villains Should Be Big Events
I distinctly recall reading an interview with some creator who stated that the Joker should show up in comics once every five years. I want to place that around the time of Death in the Family, because it seems to me like part of the movement to make comics make sense. IE, how can somebody who kills as many people as the Joker keep getting away with it? The answer being, make his appearances far less frequent... maybe every five years is a stretch, but he doesn't have to show up so often that Batman can stop him by tossing Hostess Pies at him.

And I may be wrong, but I don't recall a lot of Joker-related material in the years before Death in the Family and the years after. Riddler was AWOL for quite some time as well; the story where he returns as a talk show host (in that terrific Secret Origins Annual) was a rare appearance. Sinestro was killed and barely mentioned for years of Green Lantern (although that may just be due to the modern bias against 1960s characters with cheesy -o names.) This seemed in direct opposition to Marvel's concurrent policy of inserting Venom into every single book they printed for about three years.

Status: a "long time away" today equals about three months. Jean Loring was "unmasked" at the end of Identity Crisis and put in the slammer... and then escaped and turned into Eclipso about a week later. The Cyborg Superman gets torn to shreds and tossed into deep space at the end of every arc he appears in... only to return as soon as the camera pans skyward (boy, I hope Sinestro Corps finally finishes him off. I'm naive!) Superboy-Prime, placed under an extreme and dramatic lockdown by the Green Lanterns, was out in a few months.

What's wrong with letting villains disappear for years, to let threads dangle, until the right moment... be it years later? Well, sales, for one. It's a noble sentiment to want to keep crazies locked up in wait for a suitably dramatic reveal. But if a Joker appearance sells and New Villain Guy #47 doesn't, then it looks like Joker's back in action.

I just really wish DC would have let Jean and Superboy-Prime stew for a couple years instead of trotting them right back out for the next Event. To make matters worse, neither has done anything even worthwhile yet, making the slaughter of their previously-impressive finales all the more depressing.

Aside from a couple of random clues in 52, the highest profile "missing person" in the DCU is Ray Palmer. He's been out of touch since Identity Crisis (Feb 05) and only now is there a storyline that purports to bring him back.

 

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