Then I remembered that I have a solution stashed in the basement's yard sale pile:

If you have kids, you probably already have one of these. You get them for free from the hospital, provided you're on the Enfamil mailing list. Hell, we have two of them, and we didn't even give birth. These bags are pretty much the ugliest diaper bags in the world, but they come with some free Welcome Your New Baby! samples and coupons.

And, they're fabulous beginner-Wii transporters.

Our two bags are slightly different (this one has a cover flap, the other does not), but both contain two velcro pouches in the front, perfect for a pair of Nunchuks. Your bag will not come with a picture of Baby Clark, but you could always print one out.

And on either side is a pocket for bottles or sippy cups... or two Wii Remotes.

Like I said, this is for beginners. Once you graduate to four Remotes and thirty games, this isn't going to cut it.

Let's peek inside.

The bag is deep enough to hold everything plus a fistful of game boxes. here's my stack, which you'll note displays one first-party purchase compared to two third-party titles, thankyouverymuch.

Under that is the AC adapter and stock RCA cables. You know, I'd like to go component, but my TV doesn't have component inputs. Someday.

And further down is the sensor bar and the vertical stand (with the clear stabilizer disk). I like how the sensor bar fits inside the stand. To my reckoning, this puts the Enfamil Diaper Bag head and shoulders above the retail offerings, because I don't believe the "real" bags yet provide a safe compartment for the oddball shaped stand. I guess they either expect you to just toss it inside and hope it does not get cracked in transit, or they don't expect you to cart that around at all. Here, you get to tuck one half of the stabilizer under the interior pouch. It seems tailor-made.

Did I say "interior pouch"? I did! This zippered, cushy, insulated pocket is perfectly sized to hold and protect the Wii. I guess the Wii is roughly the same size as breastmilk sacks, or whatever the hell is supposed to sit here. Sweet.

So put that $40 right back in your wallet. A very nice Wii bag is waiting for you at your local hospital birth ward. Just register with Enfamil first or be prepared to do some fast talking at the nurses' counter.

And don't forget: this Sunday will likely be your last chance to find a Wii before Christmas if you don't already have one. So get down to Toys R Us early and stake out your place in line.

*In all candor, this is largely because everybody in the world already owned a PS2.