Although I'm not a big fan of the classic 2D Mario style, I did finally pick up New Super Mario Bros this weekend. Note to Nintendo designers: I was definitely swayed by the multiplayer stuff, particularly the devolved Mario Party minigame bonus feature. Further note: There is something about the marketing artwork - the stuff with a gigantic Mario stomping in on normal sized baddies, as seen on the game's cover - that I find absolutely compelling.
About the gameplay. Although I love retro-nostalgia, I do not love retro-gameplay. Nintendo's late focus on re-releasing classic titles has proven this out. After diving into original Metroid, Zelda and various Super Mario Advance titles, one word comes to mind: tedious. As I fought through the SMA games, it was completely un-fun. The first one was interesting as a GBA launch title - and I did love the opening movie, where Nintendo pulls back the old Game Boy screen to show off the wide expanse of the GBA screen. And the one that did SMB3 - I forget which Advance title that even was - but it was just so I could see how the eReader power-up / map scan junk worked. I lacked the fortitude to beat either of them. Meh.
You can gloryhole about classic 2D stuff all you want, but when I'm playing them today, I feel like I'm missing something. There's just not enough going on, and what is there is unfairly punishing and overly reliant on too-perfect skills... or face ridiculous amounts of forced replay. Am I simply not a very good 2D Mario player? Of course. But there's very little inside that age-old core that even makes me desire to get any better. I want story, I want drama, I want mapping, I want variety, I want scalabilty, I want depth, I want adventure.
And, as if that hoary one-hit-kill motif wasn't annoying enough, NSMB has a bullshit of a save system. You can only save your progress after beating a Tower or Castle level, or after spending Stars to open new paths. IE, not at any time on the World Map, the way you'd want and expect and need to. WTF. Further research tells me that "Save Anywhere" is actually an unlockable, received after beating the game! Holy christ Nintendo, stop giving me rewards after I'm done playing, that would only help me while I AM playing! Once I catch all the goddamn fish, I don't need a better fishing rod, capice?
At least New Super Mario Bros looks nice, even if the gameplay is still that annoying OhFuckIJumpedTooFarAndThere'sAFuckingPitFuck standard. And I like Mario's enhanced moveset. So I can give it a pass on that, for the time being. Like I said, I'm mainly interested in the multiplayer stuff, although none of it runs over online WiFi, which sucks serious stank. The 4P minigame mode, which runs exactly like one of the minigame-only games from any given Mario Party, is great. I can't believe E3 '06 came and went without mention of a Mario Party Online DS game.
Since I went to an EB to make this purchase, I got to take advantage of the DS Download Station... which was totally unadvertised. I had to ask the manager if they had one, and I was told it was under the counter (but active.) Is anything Nintendo so incredibly gay that game stores are afraid to hang up signs about it, for fear the Xbox gangbangers will start throwing flaming turds through their windows? I'm looking forward to the Wii being able to distribute DS demos to my living room.
Anyway, I grabbed the demo for Pokemon Trozei. Which was far better than anticipated. It's a stylus-based things-fall-from-the-sky puzzle game... with a collectible pokedex element, which is usually enough to get me aroused. Rhon and I were looking to enjoy the demo all weekend; I set up the power charger to keep the demo alive, since all download demos vanish once the DS is turned off. But around 11pm that night while on the toilet, I beat the demo... and, rather unexpectedly, triggered a complete DS lockdown with the friendly message "Thanks for playing! Look for Pokemon Trozei on 03/06/2006! Please turn off your DS!" Bastards.
When Trozei hits the sale rack, I'll pick it up. It's still at $35 right now, which is nuts for a no-frills puzzle game. In the year 2006, we're officially past the point when simple DS puzzle junk can sell for that... unless they've been substantially spiffed with online play and multiple variant modes like Tetris DS. I think Nintendo signaled this change by opening Brain Age (which is nothing but logic and math puzzles) at $20. By now, I should be able to pick up Yoshi's Touch-n-Go, Trozei and some Mario minigames for $30 on one cart. The days of one-off junk like that at $35 are over. I hope.
