On Larry the Cable Guy, #48: "A middle-class Nebraskan, raised in Palm Beach, whose parents sent him to private school, masquerading as an Appalachian mutant and making millions off the nine-toed cyclopes in his audience by calling his material "blue collar," when it’s really just a celebration of proud ignorance."

On Rush Limbaugh, #43: "Rather than engage in the admittedly difficult task of justifying GOP policies rationally, the key to Limbaugh’s success is attracting an audience that actually yearns to be lied to. It doesn’t matter how many righteous fact-checkers assail him in print and on the web, because dittoheads don’t care that he’s lying, as long as the lies justify their prejudices."

On Tom Cruise, #40: "Seriously, can’t even act like a human being."

On Hillary Clinton, #30: "Will probably cause yet another tragic Republican presidency."

On Terri Schiavo, #29: "As confirmed by a conspicuously underreported autopsy, Schiavo feels the same about her current situation as she did a year ago."

On God, #13: "If your answer to the age-old question of God’s existence is "yes," your next question should be, "Why is he such a dick?""

On George W. Bush, #3: "Often responds to questions by attempting to define the word he finds the most challenging in them. Thinks press reports of his various crimes are responsible for his waning popularity, rather than the deeds themselves. Interprets the constitution like a Unitarian interprets the bible; for maximum convenience and with no regard to the actual text."

I won't further spoil the list. Enjoy.