If I had been of age when Batman introduced "the sensational character find of 1940," Robin, I would have felt the same way. Oh, so because I'm a kid I'm supposed to care more about Batman because now he has a kid like me hanging around? Wonderful. I didn't like Robin until DC grew him up and took him away from Batman.

So I'm not interested at all in the new movie, and even less so now that the fundies have latched onto it as a propaganda tool. While it is true that C.S. Lewis specifically wrote the Narnia series as a Christian allegory, it is also true that he masked it well. Most kids reading those books don't make the connection at all, unless they are told to, and that it stands as just another low-end fantasy story. I've read a ton of low-end fantasy stories and I can say that most of them contain the same kind of themes that Lewis included in Narnia, but were not intended as hardcore religious peaching and were not co-opted by latter day conversionists trying to present them as such. It's just good storytelling: heroic figure sacrifices self for others. You can find that simple message in millions of stories, and only a fraction of those would have any religious connection. I think Goose from Top Gun is a Christ figure.

It is disgusting how Disney has actively persued the "Christian market" to promote the film, as they seek to duplicate Mel Gibson's Passion success. Not that I would expect anything altruistic from a major American corporation like Disney, just that the company hasn't been doing that well in recent years and they quite plainly backed a project with the style of Lord of the Rings but the potential bank account of Passion. That's what is sad. Disney hand-picked an entire religion to act as their safety net should the movie not perform. They won't do as well as Mel, simply because Narnia is too fantastical and that the most fundy of the fundies will still take umbrage to Lewis's childlike concept of "Christ does D&D." You can't get those people into a movie theater under any circumstances and Disney knows that.

No, Narnia is targeted towards the casual Christian, particularly the bubble-family who considers themselves to be out there against the wilds of temptation with naught but VeggieTales DVDs to safely entertain them. Like Lord of the Rings, Narnia has that visceral CG action but also can promise a good message. It's the blockbuster movie experience the kids want, wrapped around what parents can be assured is a nugget of wholesome Jesus teachings. You just have to walk into the theater accepting that Christ is a lion. Finally, a movie that makes it obvious enough! Although I'm sure Disney's church-specific press releases helped.

Which, of course, is ridiculous. If the books can hide the metaphor, the movies will do it doubly so. Or at least the movie will come off as no more overtly religious than Star Wars, LOTR, the Matrix or Harry Potter. It's there if you're looking for it - and definitely there if you're actively creating a discussion of it - but you could still see a good movie for a good movie without it. It's that hypocrisy that grinds me... the idea that somehow this stupid fantasy CG movie is better for kids/families/humanity than any other stupid fantasy CG movie. Most US movies are made by Christians, and lots of movies contain elements that could be inspired by the Christ story. Only because C.S. Lewis wrote a couple of rambling, blatant "I'm a humble Christian" books does this movie get the big seal of approval. If J.K. Rowling does the same thing in her golden years, we'll get a whole new reading of the Potter books, believe it.

By the way, Narnia's opening weekend take - $65 million - is just under the opening weekend take of another highly successful, critically lauded and universally praised feature film: Rush Hour 2.