I've been watching G4's live E3 coverage this week. Predictably obnoxious and terribly stacked with commercial time. They waste an awful lot of time doing unfunny comedy skits and extra-long lame intros and outros. Adam Sessler really needs a talent coach, because his on-air presence has become amateurishly awful. He always had a problem with tilting his head back and making you stare up his nose, but now he's degraded into a complete spastic... talking so fast that he can't form a coherant sentence.
Been a lot of surprises this E3. Nintendo showed off some very early pics and stats on the Revolution (is that actually going to stick as the console's name?) Sony blew everybody away with completely unexpected PlayStation3 footage. And the one team that we knew had a lot to say and a ton of hype to grind, Xbox, ends up being evasive, unimpressive and outclassed. Haw!
I don't want to be a fanboy, but Microsoft just blows. They had two things going for them this generation: great graphics and Xbox Live. Now, after the PS3 stuff, all the graphics whores who have been all over Xbox for the last few years are going to bail out to Sony... so there goes that group. They're fickle anyway, unreliable. And as for Xbox Live... be honest, isn't that a service they should have provided for PC games instead? Instead of coming out and absolutely ruling PC gaming a few years ago, Microsoft figured they already had that market sewn up so they invented the Xbox as a new money stream. They've never been about the gamers, they've been about the monopoly. If anybody could have kicked PC gaming into line, standardized everybody, made PC games work without requiring painful installs, patches and specific hardware... it would have been Microsoft. But they chose instead to lateral the PC gaming tech into a living room console. Four years later, PC gaming is still a stagnant mess positioned around a handful of tentpole games a year, the Xbox division has yet to turn a profit, and the vaunted Xbox 360 just had all its thunder ground under Sony's heel.
And what's this nonsense about backwards compatibility? Sony says yes: PS3 will play PS2 and maybe even PS1. Nintendo says yes: Revolution will play GameCube, plus they're putting together a downloadable catalog of games across the entire history of Nintendo. Microsoft says yes: Xbox 360 will play Xbox games, then they say Xbox 360 will play some Xbox games, then they say Xbox 360 will play a select few Xbox games (IE, Halo and Halo 2) once they've been recompiled and, presumably, purchased again.
Now, I tend not to care about a new console being backwards compatible. The day I get my PS3 is the day I play my final PS2 game. Backwards compatibility is a bone to parents ("Great, my kids can play their old games on their new Christmas present") and to the cheap ("Great, I don't have to rush out and buy all new games"). But the whole conversation shows just how confused and rushed Microsoft is about Xbox. They will say whatever they have to to keep the hype front and center. Faked any screenshots lately? (And just like when they ran Xbox launch demos on PC guts instead of real Xboxes, this time the Xbox 360 demos are running off of Mac G5s! So I guess they've learned something in four years: don't demo your stuff on the machines that crash.)
This editorial is typical of the op-ed pieces I've seen coming out of E3 '05. The best bit is at the end, where the author points out the read-between-the-lines moment concerning Square Enix's attitude towards the 360 and the PS3. A few days ago, Microsoft was crowing about how Final Fantasy was coming to the Xbox 360 with a new version of FF11 (the online one)... meanwhile, Square shows off this incredible FF7 PS3 render showing. FF7 is an unabashed fan favorite - I've never played the game and even I can name the major characters - while FF11 (already all but gone and forgotten on PS2 and PC) was an uneven MMORPG, mostly well received but not really a Final Fantasy game. And the Xbox 360 FF11 won't even have upgraded graphics!
The common console launch cliches have already arisen. Whiny rumormongers are saying the PS3 could cost $450. No, it won't. Jaded anti-gamers are saying the current systems have already reached the maximum density for graphics immersion. No, they haven't.
One thing to watch out for, though: Sony has a reputation for exaggeration. Which is why I've ignored the power numbers they've quoted for the PS3. But that footage they ran of Killing Day? Oh my. Yeah, it's another crappy shooter... but the graphical depth was amazing. I don't care one bit for the gameplay there, but the potential of the machine was made very, very clear. Give me a Kingdom Hearts, a Fatal Frame, a Katamari Damacy, a Metal Gear Solid, a Ratchet & Clank, a GTA with that polish.
PS2 GAMES: Shadow of the Colossus looks cool, but we liked Ico so we're automatically going to like this one. Sly Cooper 3 will have special unlockable 3D levels - like, 3D glasses-type 3D - which I'll love to see. I'm glad to hear Konami is doing a re-release of MGS3, so now I definitely don't have to worry about not getting it; I'll just hold out for the 3.5 version. Deception returns, but now with the lousy name "Trapt." EyeToy: Chat might actually come out in the US this year. There's a very distinctive game called Okami, which looks like a calligraphy-based action game... almost DS-like.
The video for MGS4 (PS3) wasn't too special. Kojima sure loves to do goofy teaser videos. It was cute, but we've sort of seen the "funny" side of Solid Snake before, and it didn't show any enhanced graphics at all.
And Nintendo, cherished Nintendo. Nintendo always comes out of these things with some absurdity that no one expected. And, honestly, it's usually something you don't really want either because the pain of not hearing what you did want to so keen. Last year, it was the DS. This year, it's the Game Boy Micro, a completely normal GBA inside a 2"x4" case. That makes three GBAs on store racks, although I'm sure the original GBA is just sitting as leftover stock. Thing is, the GBA SP is so perfect that the Micro seems wholly unnecessary. It better have a cost to match its size... I'm thinking $40 would do? Otherwise, it's purely a vanity piece, like the similarly named iPod Mini. Still, the Micro has a backlit screen just like the SP, so anyone who has yet to upgrade to an SP is running out of excuses.
CUBE GAMES: Mario Baseball, Mario Soccer, Mario DDR, Mario Party 7. Baseball, eh. I would consider soccer just because video game soccer is sort of functionally equivalent to video game hockey. DDR, already have plenty of DDR on the PS2 side, so it would have to come out pretty cheap for me to want another dance pad (and then I'd probably need a second pad for 2P stuff anyway). Mario Party 7... I was really hoping they could go a year without throwing a Mario Party, mainly because they just don't pack a punch every year. It would have been nice if they hid the series until the Revolution launch, since presumably then we could get an online version.
Odama (Cube). Pinball Real Time Strategy. When this bizarre little number first showed up, it was mentioned that a second player could use the DK Bongos to provide a morale drumbeat for the troops. Now they're saying you use the GameCube Microphone to shout commands to your armies. I hope this doesn't mean the Bongos are out, because I would consider that a very thorough use of Nintendo peripherals if you get to activate both the mic and the drums. All they need to add is a secondary GBA screen hookup and maybe some eCards and they will have justified all of my purchases over the last four years. Getting it.
Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (Cube). Link can turn into a wolf, and there happens to be a hawk or falcon in some scenes... so, people being crazy, everyone is trying to compare the new Zelda game to the craptacular move LadyHawke. This is the most press LadyHawke has received since 1985. It's probably been enough to warrant the movie getting its own Yahoo News Alert.