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Blank White Cards
03.06.05 / 05:09PM / Joe
So there's the minor internet rage going on called "1000 Blank White Cards." Now, it's no Dancing Baby. This isn't some insipid Flash movie where you push a button to make George Bush fart. In fact, I don't even know if it qualifies as a "rage," but I needed a starter sentence to the paragraph and that's what came out.
Anyway, here's the deal: it's a card game where everybody starts out with blank cards and a pen, and you just make up your own cards as you go. Credit: I first heard about it on the kokochi.com weblog, which led me to this site that explains the entire concept... and that site isn't even by the folks who actually invented the game. So there's something of an Open Source / Information Wants to be Free vibe to it already.
The rules, such as they are, emphasize creativity and fun over winning. On your turn, you draw a card and then play a card. You can play a card either on yourself, on another player, or to the center of the table where it affects all players. Generally speaking, the cards should have some kind of point value on them. The game is over when the deck is empty; highest point total wins.
However, the real gag is in making your own cards. There's an unspoken competition to see who can be the most random, the most clever, the most bizarre. We've been playing it over lunches at work for a couple weeks... so there's lots of in-jokes and junk that would be funny only to us, and your playgroup will naturally do the same. We're all really fond of coming up with ridiculous card combos... like when I started dropping "Dental Plan! +50 pts" cards for three turns, to be followed by "Lisa Needs Braces! +100 pts for every Dental Plan in play." We'll even waste turns playing cards that have little or no game value, just to do something funny and/or stupid, like Tony's "Discard... this card" card. Then there's the Double Dare style cards: Josh made a "Potty Emergency" card that requires you to run to the bathroom and bring back toilet paper within 20 seconds, at a point rate of 100 pts per square. That card is more fun within an office setting, where unaffiliated employees will witness you diving into the company bathroom. At the end of the game, there's a half-hearted attempt to tally points, but usually no one cares.
I prepped us with 200 cards (unruled index cards cut in half) and we have maybe 30 left. Here's some of my favorites so far... 
I gather that Naked Mario is a perennial favorite doodle of Tony's. Or maybe an image he just can't shake loose, even when he closes his eyes. | 
This card of Josh's is funny not just because of the expression on the poser's face, but because 4 points is an inherently worthless value. | 
I made this card during a batch of dead animal themed cards, because I was working up to a combo... | 
Did we have a lot of cats in play when Tony made this one? | 
Josh wanted to use that famous Marco Polo phrase, but what sort of game effect would fit? Of course! | 
...and here it is. Now having a Carny Goldfish or Nebulous Horsehead or Garfield Roadkill amounts to +200 points apiece. | 
Tony gives us randomness combined with a great source of potassium. | 
Fran was dying to play a Magic Shield card that would stop any attack, so Josh countered with this Seinfeld ref. | 
I play this on myself, then slap a 20 on it. Instant 2000 points, although we have yet to figure out where the 20 goes should the card get Banana'd. |
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