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Limit Hold 'Em is Boring
Thursday / 01.13.05 / 12:57AM / Joe

The stakes are raised: now Scott is in on the online PS2 poker fun. Tonight during the obligatory pre-game call, Mike asked me if I liked playing it. Sounds weird, but not really an odd question if you know Mike, or if you know me. What he's getting at is that I usually don't much enjoy games like poker... probability-based, abstract, wagering games. In fact, were it not for Doomtown, I wouldn't even know the hand ranks. As for Mike, well, he just likes asking questions.

But I do like it. I think I like it mainly due to all the gear being utilized. All three of us have identical setups: broadband and wireless network, USB headset for voice chat, EyeToy camera for live jpeggy video feed. Plus the PS2 and game, naturally. It's a pleasing amount of peripherals all working in concert to mimic three pals playing a trendy game of Texas Hold 'Em. Without all the cards and chips and cleanup.

The problem with console peripherals is that they are, by definition of "peripheral", underutilized. So the casual gamer isn't going to get his money's worth out of it. Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles is not worth one person trying to assemble all the physical parts to play it. I know; I did it. Same with Donkey Konga... one guy is not going to buy 4 sets of bongos just to enjoy the 4P jam session modes. With games like those, you have to convince friends to buy into it. So it's always nice when the extra bits (EyeToy + headset in this case) are blessed with functionality in multiple games. If I ever get to Ratchet & Clank 3, now I know two other dudes who are one game purchase away from joining me.

The EyeToy adds nothing to World Championship Poker, really. Just a goofy geeky cool factor. I think we were all promised widespread video chat about 20 years ago; it's just now coming to reality. Even though the detail is lousy, it's fun to watch the game cut between all of our faces. Or feet, or cats, depending on where the camera is pointing. Since there's no camera for the Xbox, the live video bit is a PS2 exclusive.

The game itself remains crappy. Limited environments, lacking in audio options. You hear a shuffling sound effect, but see no shuffling animation. The only visual that raises it above a PS1 game is the unique avatar system. Which, for all the crazy controls (eyeball depth, forehead length, nose width, etc), simply can't come up with an attractive human figure. Particularly in females. Wait until you see your avatar smile, it's positively ghoulish.

But fundamentally it's poker, and it's hard to screw that up. Especially when you don't bother to play the single-player game and always play online against human opponents. Can the game randomly deal cards from a set of 52? Yes. Then you're good to go.

 

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