August 26th. The in-store date for F-Zero GX, Pokemon Pinball R/S, and Soul Calibur 2. We run out to York TRU that night, knowing we've been burned before... but those are three big games, new releases for a major franchises, so they'll be there.

Nothing. Not a one. To their credit, they have signs up saying Soul Calibur 2 will be in on August 28th. Guh. Every EB and GameStop within 50 fifty miles is probably already sold out of Soul Calibur 2. We call the Lancaster Toys R Us; they have Pokemon Pinball R/S.

Around 5:30pm today I called the York TRU. This is the actual conversation, I swear.

Me: Hi, I'm looking to see if you have a particular video game in stock? (That's my standard opening line. You usually get transferred to the monkeys in the video game department, so I don't bother to ask for specifics at the front desk.)
Them: OK, let's see here, what game are you looking for? (I'm shocked that I'm not being transferred. Precious seconds lost!)
Me: Pokemon Pinball Ruby and Sapphire for Game Boy Advance. (Almost instantly I regret using the game's proper title. It's long and bound to confuse. What if she sees simply Pokemon Ruby and gives me the okay on that? But if I just say Pokemon Pinball, she might think I want the old Game Boy Color version!.)
Them: (after much typing) We have Pokemon Ruby, Pokemon Sapphire... (She pronounces "pokemon" incorrectly each time; once like "pokeyman" and once like "pokeymon.")
Me: No Pinball, eh?
Them: Oh no sir, we have Pokemon Pinball Ruby Sapphire. Just got it in today!
Me: Wow, great! Thank you. (I'm just about to hang up when she says...)
Them: Sir?
Me: Yes?
Them: If you come in tonight and you don't see them on the racks, look for the girl who works after six, Heather. Ask her and she can get the ticket for you.
Me: (stunned) Yes, I'll do that.

I get to TRU sometime approaching 7:30pm. I scan the GBA racks. No Pokemon Pinball Ruby and Sapphire. I double check. I look under alternate alphabetical spellings. Could it be placed in the "R"s? The "S"s? I do a couple laps looking for Heather. I see a likely servile suspect across the aisle swiftly jaunting into the kids clothing section. So do I flag her down like an ass and ask about Pokemon Pinball? Do I ask at the front desk? Before I can fully commit to either option, I notice the blue service desk that sits on the edge of one of the video game rows. There on the desk is a pile of Pokemon Pinball tickets. And F-Zero GX.

I grab a Pokemon Pinball ticket and calmly walk off down the aisle. Out of the corner of my vision I see Heather returning. Did she notice I swiped a ticket off the desk? Will she confront me? Have I thrown her inventory counts off? I risk it all and head to the checkout. Within five minutes the game is mine, no questions asked.

Heather, I realize you're just a cog in the machine, but put the fucking tickets out on the racks sometime before the close of fucking business. It's 7:30pm and people still can't buy games that should have been on display since yesterday? The store closes in two hours, for fucking out loud. I've often considered pulling the manager aside - because I know this isn't a problem limited to Heather - and politely asking him just what the shit is going on.

So why do I stick with Toys R Us, since EB and everywhere else gets games in on time? Pure capitalism. I have one of those TRU Visas that generates free gift certificates based on your spending record. Since May 1999, I've accrued almost $1000 in free money from that credit card. That's over $200 free every year... or, in more likely terms, a free launch day PS2 and GameCube plus eight free games.

As for Soul Calibur 2, we saw a Target sales flyer that promises a free $5 gift card with your SC2 purchase. That's a financially better return than the TRU Visa, so we'll be checking that out tomorrow.

The ironic bit is that, after playing Pokemon Pinball for an hour on my Game Boy Player and watching the ball dive straight down between the flippers for the millionth time... I was like "Meh. I hate goddamn pinball."