I remember reading some kid's terrible review of Grand Theft Auto 3, where he bashed that game's "eighties station." I wonder what he thinks of the all-80s Vice City. I love it... although having real music creates a much more personal reaction while you're flipping the channels. Now, you can find songs that you've hated for years, so getting that radio on an acceptable frequency is very important.

I was playing Vice City last night when my pal Matt stopped by. He lives next door, and he's in sixth grade. So I let him play.

Perhaps I should have cleared it with his mom first, but I viewed it as a kind of socio-ludological experiment. Plus, I know the game is fun, despite the subject matter. His first actions revolved mainly around the cars. I told him how to get into a car and drive around. Carnage ensued, but only because he liked getting the car going as fast as he could. Only when he realized that you can play through a goodly amount of accidents without having to stop, did he purposefully cause extreme accidents. Meanwhile I'm on the sidelines yelling "Triangle! Triangle! When the car bursts into flames, triangle!" I didn't have to point out which cars are faster, because he could instinctively tell that just by looking at them. I did mention he could ride bikes too, and that quickly became a priority.

As for hand-to-hand combat, he had to resort mainly on fists... what with all the crazy flaming car wreck deaths he went through. But he did learn rather quickly that if you kill a cop, the cop will drop a baton or a pistol. After a couple fist fights, shootouts, and the inevitable "Busted," he asked me what he was supposed to do.

I thought that was interesting. He's looking for a goal; he knows that simply driving and punching out cops can't be the entire game. I explained that you pick up tasks at various locations, or you can start missions just by stealing a cab or police car. Although I obviously don't believe in the magic bullet notion that violent video games beget violent kids, I was poised to stop him if he actually triggered a plotline mission, because they do a fair amount of R-rated dialogue in the cutscenes. I know he's a good kid, but I don't want him talking Tommy Vercetti to his mom when she's on him to do his homework.

And Rhonda has a prodigy of her own; she's mentoring a young lady named Amanda. With all our interactions with Matt and Amanda, we've become something of an urban legend in their schoolrooms: a childless couple with tons of video games and Pokemon cards. Their friends flat out refuse to believe we exist, much less that we have them over to play and shower them with Pokemon card doubles. We're definitely a pink neon sign for disposable income, and just maybe we're an inspiration that adults don't always suck.