...because this weekend is the last weekend in my entire life that I will not personally know the glory of Super Mario Sunshine. That makes this weekend perhaps the longest weekend ever, although I intend to whet it down with a quickie purchase of Duke Nukem Advance. (My wife persists in rumors of some kind of "fabulous warehouse sale" this Saturday, which I know from experience involves a great deal of me standing in a long, long line while she continues to shop. Friend Duke will come in extremely handy.)

Beyond all the Shines I'm going to Get, we've got Animal Crossing and the savory e-Reader in September. Were I to suddenly create a child right this very now, I would christen him/her "e-Reader." And little e-Reader Fourhman would spend the rest of his/her days downloading NES games to my GBA and swiping Pokemon cards. Mere moments after that comes Starfox Adventures. Mario Party 4, Grand Theft Auto Vice City and Resident Evil 0 hit in October. And in November, Metroid Prime and the new Tomb Raider. The cumulative effect of these games is so potent that otherwise must-have games like Sly Cooper, NHL 2003, Superman: Shadow of Apokolips, and Super Monkey Ball 2 might just be relegated to second-tier purchases.

And then there's goddamn Kingdom Hearts (Sept), a game that brings me to literal tears every time I watch a demo movie. I've always been a big Disney fan, and this game seems to justify my continued existence. No, not "seems to." Begs to.

The warm up is over. What is past (Eternal Darkness, Warcraft 3, Medal of Honor: Variations on a Theme) is prologue.